SQ Wisdom: Listening to your heart

As parents, we are good at giving instructions, planning, and executing.  But are we good at listening?

Proverbs 18: 13-15 says, "To answer before listening that is folly and shame.  The human spirit can endure in sickness, but a crushed spirit who can bear?  The heart of the discerning acquires knowledge, for the ears of the wise seek it out."

There are three lessons here for us:

1.  Listen first.  We tend to react quickly to our children's behaviors.  Worries and concerns fill our hearts.  We are anxious and want to make sure everything is in order.  We talk, answer, and express our anxieties before observing, listening, and understanding what is happening.  Listening first put us in a position of humility.  Listening gives us room to think.  Listening brings knowledge.

2.  Lighten up.  We carry a great deal of burden within our hearts.  Our human spirit can endure a lot of physical pain, but anguish within our hearts may accumulate and crush us.  We need to learn to unload, declutter, and work through emotional pains.  Coming to Jesus, our Savior and Lord, to have a new start becomes even more critical as parents (read Mt. 11:28).

3.  Love wisely.  We listen to our hearts.  We befriend our fears about our kids, our family, and our future.  When we accept our limitations and our kids' boundaries, we may be able to make rooms within ourselves to better listen to our kids.  We learn of their needs, aspirations, and the way they see the world.  We thus become wise, discerning, and loving.