How to Develop Our Own SQ first?
There are a few significant questions to ask ourselves as parents when it comes to developing SQ. (We define SQ as the capacity to be spiritually connected, dream, have a vision, make meaning, create long-lasting values and creativity in facing life challenges.)
Firstly, what is the ultimate authority in our own lives as parents? This question will determine the extent of how our values are shaped, how we exercise power, and how we exert influences. If our answer is that the ultimate authority is ourselves or another person within our circle of influence, we are creating a scenario of a wavering sea of opinions. If our answer is that God's ultimate authority exits, we are introducing a picture of a higher being who is bigger than us. As older children or teens may ask, which gods are you talking about? How can they discover the true God? Or is there one at all. This introduces a good conversation and interaction on a more profound philosophical and existential level between the two generations. As a group of parents, we hope to explore this together and support each other on this journey of discovering God, experiencing God, and enjoying God.
Secondly, what are your own experiences in facing shattered dreams or disappointments, in sufferings or pain, in creating life-supporting values, or in transforming stories and memories? This question reflects your capacity and the ability to be wise. Life is full of challenges that knowledge cannot solve. Money cannot take care of nor power to change. We either go through life with bitterness, or we go through life becoming wiser. We learn from our own failings and from the experiences of others. We become wiser when we humbly learn. We become wiser when we fear God. Wise parents will guide their children to a safe haven in the sea of opposing opinions and ideas. Wise parents will share their own vulnerabilities with their children and leave a legacy of hope.
Thirdly, how do we gain from the wisdom and be able to share it with our children? This question brings us to a practical level. To develop spiritual intelligence, we need to find space to reflect. Without pausing from our busy schedule, we risk burning out ourselves and our kids. Without finding space to reflect, we may turn a good race into a rat race. By finding physical space, we give ourselves rest, clarity, and renewed strength. By establishing emotional space, we let go of each other. We become respectful of each others' differences in the pace of life and intensities of passion. We appreciate more the expression of diverse intelligence and strength.
Firstly, what is the ultimate authority in our own lives as parents? This question will determine the extent of how our values are shaped, how we exercise power, and how we exert influences. If our answer is that the ultimate authority is ourselves or another person within our circle of influence, we are creating a scenario of a wavering sea of opinions. If our answer is that God's ultimate authority exits, we are introducing a picture of a higher being who is bigger than us. As older children or teens may ask, which gods are you talking about? How can they discover the true God? Or is there one at all. This introduces a good conversation and interaction on a more profound philosophical and existential level between the two generations. As a group of parents, we hope to explore this together and support each other on this journey of discovering God, experiencing God, and enjoying God.
Secondly, what are your own experiences in facing shattered dreams or disappointments, in sufferings or pain, in creating life-supporting values, or in transforming stories and memories? This question reflects your capacity and the ability to be wise. Life is full of challenges that knowledge cannot solve. Money cannot take care of nor power to change. We either go through life with bitterness, or we go through life becoming wiser. We learn from our own failings and from the experiences of others. We become wiser when we humbly learn. We become wiser when we fear God. Wise parents will guide their children to a safe haven in the sea of opposing opinions and ideas. Wise parents will share their own vulnerabilities with their children and leave a legacy of hope.
Thirdly, how do we gain from the wisdom and be able to share it with our children? This question brings us to a practical level. To develop spiritual intelligence, we need to find space to reflect. Without pausing from our busy schedule, we risk burning out ourselves and our kids. Without finding space to reflect, we may turn a good race into a rat race. By finding physical space, we give ourselves rest, clarity, and renewed strength. By establishing emotional space, we let go of each other. We become respectful of each others' differences in the pace of life and intensities of passion. We appreciate more the expression of diverse intelligence and strength.
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